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  • Writer's picturegitasuliawan

I am an Ambivert; the story of why secretly an Extrovert enjoys the solitude

Updated: Jul 14, 2018

I never care about how the theory define me as a person, not until the recent two years I get into the work field and compulsory to undergo some psychological test as a requirement for HR consideration. This probably gives a huge image of whether the candidate will fit the position or not, or simply how she/he will react towards obstacles in their jobs.

I took the MBTI test for about 4th times already, the results are same, "I am an ENFJ". I do realize I'm an extrovert, that I feel happy when I'm around people. But there's always like a contradiction whenever I met a new person, I don't think I'll that easy to blend and be the merry kind of me. There's like an automatic filter that I have and I kind of take it as an advantage so I'm not gonna easily blurb things out just because I'm a people person.

Two weeks ago I just found out that there's also a phenomenon that findings by Adam Grant, that its likely someone will fall in the middle. Their not an introvert nor an extrovert, people like us were called "Ambivert".

Forbes stated Grant quotation, which explained his findings along with how Ambivert most likely succeed as a Salesperson,

“Because they naturally engage in a flexible pattern of talking and listening, ambiverts are likely to express sufficient assertiveness and enthusiasm to persuade and close a sale, but are more inclined to listen to customers’ interests and less vulnerable to appearing too excited or overconfident.”

For me, this pattern explains a lot why I'm being open but also having clear boundaries at the same time. I found my self-feeling happy in solitude, not likely how an extrovert would deal with a celebration itself, at my Sweet Seventeen Birthday I'm avoided the party like the other girls actually wanted it. Simply because I don't like to be in the spotlight, where everyone will stares at me and discussing about my self all through the celebration.

Furthermore, I just meet a new friend last saturday. He hardly accepting that my test result is an Extrovert, probably because he witness how clumsy I am toward him during our first meet. He said no way I am an extrovert, this made me think more about whether it was right that I am an Extrovert, or I am just an Introvert in ignorance

I'm glad that I'm in the middle, not hard to socialize but still keep the genuine needy and open sides to the trusted one. Have you discovered what you are? or you just like me earlier, don't know what exactly your self-are? I hope you find what actually you are~

Cheers for the people in between, you're not an odd person, just unique and situational.

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